I am nothing if not random

[irrelevant]

I get so frustrated with my brain and my writing and the English language. I always feel like... WRITING: UR DOIN IT WRONG. like there's a better way to get my point across, a better grouping of words, a better way of positioning them to make them feel right and look right and say exactly what I want them to. like somewhere in my brain a switch is turned off and I just need to find it and turn it on and writing will happen the way I want it to.

which is bullshit, but I can't help *feeling* that way.